Allegations of Child Abuse in Honey Boo Boo’s New Television Show

Honey Boo Boo has become one of the most talked about reality television personalities, ever since the 6-year-old pageant queen gained fame through TLC’s super popular series, Toddlers and Tiaras. The premiere episode garnered over 2.2 million viewers on August 8^th and received universal critical praise for its “social commentary”.

All is not well in the land of Honey Boo Boo, because not only are these Hills Have Eyes creations fame whores, but charges of child abuse have been filed. In March, investigators from Georgia’s Division of Family and Children Services made a visit to the family cave of Honey Boo Boo.

According to The National Enquirer, a source says, “Honey Boo Boo’s upbringing raised eyebrows with the neighbors. The parents feed her energy drinks, cheese puffs for breakfast and brag about how they cook roadkill for meals. She even eats roadkill with flies swarming around her head!” OMG!

The authorities only flipped out their badges when a videotape of Honey Boo Boo was posted online. This video showed Honey Boo Boo dancing for dollars on a table in a bar. How funny that might sound, our ears are actually ringing from being too disturbed to listen or to watch. TLC never filmed this episode, which proves that one of Boo Boo’s parents (read June, her mother) might have filmed the video. June defended her daughter’s actions and explained that it was a college bar and not a “sleazy” one. Is this woman completely insane? Whether it is a college bar and/or a sleazy one, it still doesn’t matter! The kid was dancing for money in a bar! She’s six!

The investigators brought the case to court, but June’s court-appointed attorney (don’t they make enough money now to pay for their own attorneys?) convinced the judge to throw out the case and after filming was brought to a standstill by the child abuse allegations, filming hastily resumed again in May.

The show might have received staggering viewership numbers and critical praise, but there is still a storm of controversy surrounding this family from the woods of hell. Boo Boo’s sister will be giving birth to a baby girl in this season with two right thumbs, and June (the child abuser) will be making fun of the defect.

Look, we’re all for exciting and controversial reality television, but this whole saga is like watching a Wes Craven film. Georgia will never be the same again after the backwards loons from this show become international personalities. Stereotypes have never been this realistically approached.

The source added, “If the family had been charged for having bad taste, the judge would have thrown the book at them.”

No, this isn’t bad taste; this is a nightmare which we will never be able to un-see.

God speed to this family of carnival horrors.